Now here's a broad who looks like he'd be fun to knock back tequila shooters with at a party, because you just know five minutes later his speedo's gonna end up on the ceiling fan and he'll be table-dancing all over some other bitch's jacket.

A self-described "untouchable," that lowest rung of the high school social ladder below the band geeks, stoners, and girls who got pregnant the first time they put out, teenage gay-bo Kkris T An epitomizes the abject humiliation of puberty: as gawky, unpopular and inappropriate-boner-popping as the day is long.

They are all looking to get fame and fortune. And even the youngest boys dream about stardom. I am able to give everything to them, not for free, of course. A cute young boy, totally unspoiled... It's so lovely when he eats strawberry from my hands. And then I'll undress him and put him on a weighing scale so that he stands obediently with his pride sticking out. I'll tease his lips with a strawberry and then replace it with a cigarette. I'll kkristan'd him up so hard and he will understand what it means to be a star. And then I'll feed the berry to him, having creamed it with organic wheep beforehand. Fashion screams! when he puts my t-shirt on.

Amy Winehouse, Lady GaGa, Space Cowboy, Katy Perry, Metric, Lykke Li, Sia, Jeffree Star (the sound, not the singing)

Horror movies, so scary you wont get off the sofa for a second bowl of organic buttered popcorn.

Reality shows are funny!

Choke, The Secret, The Law Of Attraction: The Basics of the Teachings of Abraham, The Four Agreements, The Seven Spirital Laws of Success, The Celestine Prophecy: An Adventure, Letters to A Young Poet.